Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Life is Sometimes Hard

Ok, so I'm new to this blogging stuff, but many years ago I used to journal about my life, thoughts and feelings and really loved doing that. But then I got married, had kids and got out of the habit of journaling, and I'm realizing that I miss it. And now there is blogging, and I think it's going to be right up my "alley" and help me get back to writing about my life. So here it goes. Hopefully it will wake up my love of writing again and not bore too many of you to tears. :-)

Of course the first and foremost thing I will start this blog about is our financial situation. It really stinks right now, hence my title that "Life is Sometimes Hard." Right now it is VERY hard! My husband has had his own computer programming business for the past 17+ years with one main client for the past 11+ years. This client has kept him more than enough busy, which was great! But now, this one and only client decided to "go a different direction" and is now gone. We are now in a situation with NO income! Yikes! The lessons I am learning about letting go of worry and fear and simply trusting in God's care and provision for us are HUGE! I've always been SUCH a worrier, and I'm telling you, the worry-rut is deep, and I'm finding it hard to climb out of it! I feel pretty battered and bruised from climbing and falling trying to get out of this huge worry-rut. However, I am seeing God's Hand more and more as I go through this. The past couple of days have been particularly hard... we were pretty sure that Bob had found another client, and he had been in contact with them for a couple of months with everything sounding promising, and then THEY decided to "change direction" and now they won't need him! What's with these companies and all this direction changing??? So this past week has been HARD! I've been struggling daily to not let my fears take over and fall right back into that worry rut. These struggles come with feelings of "evil forboding" and fears for our future that just start looming up big and ugly. So, I've been crying out to God and asking for His strength to just trust Him and be thankful for today. I need to give my fear of our future to Him. He's got it securely under control, even though I don't always feel that. So, life is sometimes hard, as it is for us right now. But God is in control, and I must put, AND KEEP my trust in Him and then hopefully His peace will replace the fear and worry that seems to hound me on a regular basis. A scripture that spoke to me today is:

Wait patiently for the Lord. Be brave and courageous. Yes, wait patiently for the Lord.
~ Psalm 27:14

So I wait, knowing that He knows what He's doing with my family and me... and that does give me peace. Prayers, if you're so inclined, are always appreciated. :-)

2 comments:

  1. Welcome to the blog world :) I didn't realize you would graduating your oldest this year...how exciting!

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  2. Continued prayers for your situation, and I ask the same of you for us! good post, Pam.

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